Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I've blown a few things in my day
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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