WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
