we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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