The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
