Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize