shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
