Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize