Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
