I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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