operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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