I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
