Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
