Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
