Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize