Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
