It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
