I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
