Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I forgot how hot balto sounded
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
