hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
