This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
You're like the curious george of whores
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
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