I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize