Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
