oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
