we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Randomize
