why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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