You work out of a Hotel?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
