For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
