My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Can I color on your dick again?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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