Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
