Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize