I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
