he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
