I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I skipped work to stalk him.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
