"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
