he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
