My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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