you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
