Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
