Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
