quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
