I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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