He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize