Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
