1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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