CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize