So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
And then he peed in my hair
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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