If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
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