whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
