i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
