i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Text me some of your sweat
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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